Insane Page 9

  There was a pretty girl sitting on my bed, in the dark.

  If we weren’t in a psych hospital in the middle of a power-out, I’d have been thrilled. As it was, I was struggling not to think anything I shouldn’t. I doubted anyone could blame me. Seventeen year old boy. No contact with girls my own age in two years. Pretty sure I could get a pass for One Free Dirty Thought.

  Taking a breath and trying to refocus, I said, That doesn’t explain why you’re here in the first place. In my room.

  She dropped her gaze. I couldn’t be sure in this light, but I thought she blushed. Quietly, she murmured, Chester vanished and I…got freaked out. I just didn’t want to be alone in my room. Staring at her knees, she folded her hands together, and a lock of her jet-black hair fell from behind her ear. Now I was certain she was blushing.

  She got scared, and came to me. That was almost too cute – and it made me feel weirdly…glad. I grinned. Amused, I shifted and leaned back on my elbows, stretching out my legs across the bed. Well then, I’m sure we can think of something to do until the lights come back on.

  Her head whipped up and this time, even in the dim light, I could see her cheeks were red. She hopped off the bed, the beam from the torch swinging around the room. I held up a hand to shield my eyes as she lifted it to point directly into my face. On second thought, I’ll take my chances alone. She turned toward the door, and my stomach dipped at the thought of being left in the black dark again.

  I rolled off the bed and caught her wrist, looking down at her. Stay. Please.

  She blinked up at me, her face in shadow with the torch pointed down. Then she nodded slowly. Her lips formed the word, “Okay.”

  I held onto her wrist for a moment longer, intrigued by the way her pulse was fluttering against my fingertips. Her eyes seemed awfully wide in her pale face, her hair an ebony curtain blending into the blackness. Her lips were parted with her breathing, and I had the sudden almost overwhelming desire to kiss her. Swallowing, I stepped back and retreated to the bed, scooting back into the corner. After a second, she followed and sat on the very end, as far from me as possible, pointing the torch upward.

  She turned, pulling her legs onto the bed and folding them under her. So, she said warily, Nice room.

  I smiled. Thanks. I was going for a minimalist look.

  She nodded, her lips twitching. Then she sobered, and a look I didn’t quite understand crossed her face. Why don’t you speak? I mean, aloud?

  My smile faded and I looked away, staring at the diffused circle of yellow light on the ceiling. It took me a moment to decide how to answer. I didn’t look at her as I asked, You ever try talking to someone in the middle of a really loud concert? She didn’t answer, just stared at me with those wide blue eyes, but I went on. You talk, but you can’t hear yourself talk. That’s what it feels like to me, talking aloud, but it’s not too-loud music overpowering my voice – it’s too-loud silence. It…it’s weird, talking and not hearing my own voice.

  She didn’t say anything. In fact, she was speechless for so long that if I hadn’t been watching the torch light tremble on the ceiling, I’d have thought she’d left. I finally looked down at her, but I couldn’t read her expression – it was disconcerting. Over the last two years, I’d learned to read people’s expressions as much as their lips. But Callie was difficult to read. Then her lips moved, and she said, both aloud and in my head, “Say something. Aloud.” It wasn’t a request.

  I frowned. I really don’t–

  She pouted. “Please?”

  Tilting my head, I tried to read her. And failed. There was nothing on her face but that falsely innocent pout. Why? I asked, curious.

  She looked down, a faint smile curling the corner of her lips. She glanced at me, a flash of blue-green eyes under her dark hair. I like your voice, she whispered shyly.

  I didn’t know what to say to that. My gaze trailed to her lips, and not because I was trying to read them. I really wanted to kiss her right then. I opened my mouth and said quietly, “I don’t know whether to be flattered or creeped out.”

  She rewarded me with a smile that made her eyes light up. My heart tripped up, and I swallowed. Cautiously, I lifted a hand toward her, skimming my fingertips across her cheek. Her eyes widened, and she bit her lip softly. My hand trembled. “Callie,” I breathed, leaning closer. Her eyelids fluttered closed, her sigh brushing warm breath across my palm and making my stomach twist.

  Her lips formed my name, and I felt my pulse beating in my throat as I slid my hand to the back of her neck, my mouth inches from hers…

  And then the lights came back on, and we jerked apart in surprise. She sprang off the bed, her face flushed. I sat back, my heart beating too fast. Her mouth moved, but her lips were trembling, so I couldn’t make out the words. I stared at her blankly, but she didn’t look at me. Vaguely, I made out the shape of the word ‘bye’ and then she was heading for the door. I didn’t try to stop her.

  I watched her leave, and felt the crushing silence descend on me once again, like a smothering blanket. I got back in my bed, rolled over to face the wall, and pulled the covers over my head to wait impatiently for sleep because at least in my dreams, there was sound.

  Chapter Six

  ** Casey **

  The next day, I was reluctant to pull myself out of my room. I hadn’t been able to sleep well last night, between the usual nightmares about my step-mother, my nerves being jacked up from the blackout, and the squirmy feeling I got when my mind kept straying to Callie and our almost-kiss. I had the horrible feeling she would be avoiding me today.

  But when I got to the common room, I saw her sitting by one of the huge windows, her leg jittering up and down, her eyes darting until they finally fell on me, and a look of intense relief swept over her features. She sprang out of her seat and crossed the room, throwing her arms around me and squeezing me tightly. I was so startled I didn’t know what to do until she abruptly pulled back, a blush coloring her cheeks. Sorry, she murmured in my head, I just…I was so scared that you were…that it was you… Her eyes drifted to the window, her eyes shadowed.

  I frowned, confused. “What are you talking about?” I asked, and her head whipped around. It wasn’t until I saw the look on her face that I realized I’d spoken aloud. I blinked. It had been two years since I spoke aloud without thinking about it. But I felt comfortable enough around Callie after last night that it just slipped out.

  It seemed to take her a moment to recover, and I tried not to grin. What did my voice sound like to her, to make her look so…star-struck? I knew I had once had a good singing voice, but I couldn’t imagine what I sounded like now. Hoarse probably. I only heard my own voice inside my head, and I was sure that wasn’t how my real voice sounded.

  Finally, Callie took a deep breath – I saw her chest rise and fall dramatically, and tried not to stare – and turned away, speaking to me telepathically. Another patient died last night. I just found out from RJ, but he wouldn’t tell me who it was, and I was getting worried that maybe, after I left your room… She bit her lip, turning wide, anxious eyes on me, and I felt the full force of them make my heart trip up. God, she was stunning. I was scared it was you, Case, she added softly.

  Instinctively, I reached for her hand to comfort her and assure her I was okay, but she shifted away, wrapping her arms around her waist. I dropped my hand, uncertain, and replied mentally, I’m fine. See? I held out my arms. I’m right here. So stop worrying.

  She nodded, but she still looked nervous. And then her ghost buddy popped into existence right next to her, and I jerked in surprise. She didn’t so much as flinch. But her eyes sharpened and she dropped her arms, no longer hugging herself. She and Chester exchanged a long, wordless look, and I felt a pang of…jealousy? No, it had to be irritation. I didn’t like Chester. He just bugged me for some reason. I couldn’t put my finger on it. Something about him just rubbed me the wrong way – maybe it was the way he looked at me; always glaring. Always subtly angling himself
in front of Callie, as if he was protecting her from me.

  Callie grabbed my hand suddenly and started pulling me toward the common room doors. I saw Chester scowl, and I smirked at him, enjoying the feel of Callie’s small hand gripping mine as she tugged me out the doors and into the hallway. Chester followed, floating along behind Callie like a balloon on a string, though he looked more like a thundercloud.

  Finally, we came to a stop outside Callie’s room – I recognized the number on the door from the night RJ the guard had led us back from the foyer – and she dropped my hand. A tiny wave of disappointment washed through me, but I shook it off. Chester was still scowling, but he seemed slightly less thunderous when Callie wasn’t touching me. That made me bristle. It made me wanted to snatch up Callie’s hand again just to piss him off.

  Then I realized what it was on his face. I had mistaken it for jealousy over Callie’s attention, but that wasn’t it. It was jealousy over the fact that she could touch me. He looked real enough, but he was a ghost. Curious, I swept my hand out and waved it through his arm. A tingle shot up my arm, but other than that, there was nothing. Just air. He jerked back, an angry curse shaping his lips, and Callie looked at me with a mix of amusement and admonishment. “Why did you do that?” she asked, her lips forming the words clearly.

  I shrugged. “I was curious.”

  Chester’s lip curled and I saw him say, “Look, he talks.”

  I shot him the finger. “Shut up asshole.” He turned on me, his hazel eyes narrowed to fierce slits. I smirked. “What you gonna do, ghost boy? Yell boo? Oh wait, I won’t even hear it…” I rarely joked about my own deafness, but right now, it seemed fitting. And Chester looked like he desperately wished he had real hands so he could really strangle me.

  Before the ghost could blow a gasket, Callie stepped between us and held up her hands in a T. “Okay, time out, you two. Can we focus here please?” She gave us each a significant narrow-eyed look, and I raised my hands in surrender, backing off. She nodded and looked at Chester, who was still glowering at me like he was waiting for the ceiling to fall on me. I didn’t see what Callie said because her face was turned away from me, but whatever it was, it made Chester relax and he gave her a tiny smile in response.

  Then Callie turned and grinned at someone down the hall. I glanced back and saw RJ strolling toward us. His eyes darted between us, and he stopped in front of us, giving Callie a meaningful look. “What you two up to out here?” he asked, mouth shaping the question.

  Callie batted her lashes, smiling innocently. “Wouldn’t you like to know,” she teased, and I snorted, leaning back against the wall. RJ gave me a sideways glance and smirked.

  “No,” he said, shaking his head. “I probably wouldn’t. But seeing as it’s my job to keep an eye on you guys and make sure you’re not planning trouble…” He stepped back and leaned against the opposite wall, folding his arms, mimicking my casual pose. He raised his eyebrows. “Continue whatever you were doing. Pretend I’m not here.”

  Callie scowled at him for a second, and then shrugged and turned to me, putting her hands on my chest I raised an eyebrow, glancing at R.J who was watching us with narrowed eyes expectantly. Callie leaned up, her breath whispering against my lips, and I stared into her eyes, wondering what the hell she was doing. Just go with it, she said mentally, repeating my words from the night of the first blackout. He’ll leave if he thinks all we’re doing is making out.

  And then she kissed me. Well, sort of. She laid her lips very lightly against mine and slid her hands up my chest, up the sides of my neck, and into my hair. I sucked in a careful breath, closing my eyes, and resisting the urge to really kiss her.

  Suddenly, she pulled away, her cheeks pink, and grinned. “He’s gone. Works every time.”

  I blinked and realized she was right. RJ was stalking off down the hall, shaking his head. Chester, though, appeared to be simmering furiously – I was half surprised there wasn’t steam floating off his ghostly form. He snapped something angrily at Callie that I judged from the way she rolled her eyes was a sarcastic comment. She said something back, and I made out the words, “bite me” at the end. I smiled.

  With one last glare at me, Chester vanished. I raised an eyebrow at Callie as she turned. “What was that about?” I asked.

  She made a face. “Just Chester throwing a hissy fit. He doesn’t like you much.” She spoke aloud, but her voice echoed in my head.

  I snorted. “The feeling is mutual.”

  She frowned at that. “He’s not normally a dick. He just worries about me, you know? It’s kind of his job. He acts like my big brother sometimes, and he feels like he has to protect me from guys with…impure intentions.” She glanced at me then and blushed. “Not that you have…I didn’t mean…”

  I laughed, finding her embarrassment adorably amusing. She shut her mouth and pushed a lock of her black hair behind her ear. I grinned at her mischievously. “You’re the one who dragged me out here into the empty hallway. Maybe you’re the one with impure intentions.”

  Her blush deepened, but she glared at me. “My intentions are to get the hell out of this place before the next blackout and one of us ends up earning our freedom in a body bag.”

  That killed my amusement, and I stared at her. “You’re going to try to escape again?”

  She nodded. “And you’re coming with me.”

  I shook my head. “I can’t…if I escape here and the police catch me, I go to jail for the next god-know-how-many years.”

  Callie reached out and took my hand gently in hers, her eyes fierce. “And if you stay, you could die like those other patients. Case, there’s something weird going on in this place. Something unnatural and scary. Even Chester knows it.”

  I knew she was right. I wished I could go with her. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t risk ending up in jail. The odds of me being the next blackout victim were too small for me to take that chance. There were over two hundred patients in this building. I had roughly a one in two hundred chance of dying in the next power-out, and probably less than a ten percent chance of escaping this place and getting off scot-free.

  No. The odds were not in my favor. I had to stay.

  “I can’t,” I said again, regretting my words as Callie’s face crumpled.

  But then she dropped my hand and stepped back, her eyes going cold. She nodded. “Fine. I’ll get myself out. You can stay and play Russian roulette with the blackout monster.” She turned and strode off, and I saw Chester fade in beside her as she pushed through the doors to the common room.

  I leaned my head back against the wall and sighed. “Damn.”

  ** Callie **

  I stayed away from Casey for the rest of the week, waiting for the next blackout, my next chance to escape. He wasn’t going to talk me out of it this time, and if he wouldn’t come with me, there was no point in spending time with him – that was what I told myself over and over, when I found myself scanning the common room for him every time I walked in, every night when I lay awake replaying that moment in his room when I was sure he was about to kiss me.

  Chester noticed my preoccupation, and though I told him it had nothing to do with Casey, that I was just busy thinking about my escape plan, he didn’t believe me – he knew me well enough to know when I was lying.

  It was stupid, I told myself, to be so worried about a guy I’d only met two weeks ago. A guy who was locked in a mental hospital for killing his step-mother – not that I blamed him. I probably would have done the same thing in his position. But it didn’t matter how many times I reprimanded myself for thinking about Casey, I couldn’t stop. Part of me was anxious for the next blackout, desperate to get out of here as soon as possible, but the other part hoped there wouldn’t be another blackout, prayed that nobody else would die.

  What if I left and Casey was the next victim of whatever was happening during these power-outs? The last patient to die was a guy from the Fourth Floor – found hanging in his room. The guards were all talki
ng about it and the woman who’d died falling down the stairs. Although it seemed obvious they were just an accident and a suicide…I had a bad feeling. Maybe it was just that Chester had me freaked out – it had been days since the last blackout, but every time I brought up the power-outs, he got this grim expression on his face. I asked him again about what he’d meant when he said the hospital felt ‘dark’, but all he would tell me was he didn’t know how to explain it.

  “I don’t know, Cal. I don’t know how else to explain it. It’s like…” Chester sat cross-legged on my bed, frowning. There was a line between his brows, and he was toying with the hoop in his ear. “It’s like there’s a shadow over this place, and every time there’s a blackout, I get this feeling, like there’s someone breathing down the back of my neck. And last time…I didn’t mean to leave you, Cal, I really didn’t. I don’t even know what happened. I remember everything going dark, and I just felt that icy breath on my neck, and then…nothing. It was like when I pass out for a couple of days, only I didn’t feel tired or faded – it was more like something knocked me out.”

  I noticed he said something and not someone. I shivered, standing by the window and looking out past the bars at the skeletal arms of the trees shaking in the wind. The moon was a sliver of ice hanging amidst the stars, casting an eerie glow over the courtyard. Every shadow looked sinister, like creatures crouching by the steps, in the branches, by the gates.

  I didn’t doubt there was something sinister in the asylum, something not human. And it was a hell of a lot scarier than my ghost best friend.

  Chapter Seven

  ** Callie **

  It was another two days before there was another blackout, and when it finally happened, I wasn’t at all prepared. In fact…I was asleep, locked in a nightmare full of screaming and red eyes in the darkness.